Hmmm....the other day, Heli (for all of U who dont know him,he is one hell of a chweet critic) came and asked with all the seriousness of Bush post 9/11, "Srujith, what is the meaning of creative juice?".
This does not have anything to do with what Iam writing now, but just felt like telling it out and so there it was!!

I have been doing a few things these days which would open the mouths of all my relatives stright from my granny to my nephew including the garlanded photos of my ancestors ;)

I'VE BEEN TO THE TEMPLE TWICE IN THE PAST WEEK!!!

The past week-and-a-half has been the most violent since a long time emotionally.
Even though that is not a reason to go to a temple considering my Agnostic belief's, I was inside the premises before I knew what I was doing. And it gave me a strange feeling of deep satisfactoin which I could not achieve even after years of meditation.

Probably the time to re-evaluate my views towards a supernatural power(read GOD) has dawned.
Let us keep this away till my vision in this matter becomes a little more clear.

It has been a long time since my last post and I know not many people are missing them.
The three months of total bliss have come to an end.
Morning jogs(Just once a while) , 8:30 classes and the God-knows-why tutorials and labs have started once again.It feels good to be in the company of my friends again.
My days now, will mostly be routine and busy.I wish I knew why my creative juices(no pun intended!!) stop flowing when I enter college. I mostly become vegetative and boring.Well, this time, it will not be the case. Because I will try not to make it so.

It is anybody's guess that the juices have already dried up ;)

"Srujith, why dont you get up early in the morning at 6? The scriptures and elders say it is good for health"
To hell with the GODDAMN scriptures! I want to lead my own life.I dont care a bit what the elders say.

"Srujith, brush your teeth."
My friends dont brush and have bath for days ma!!.10 minutes is not going to make my teeth rot
"Srujith, dont sit in front of that damn idiot box and start off drooling at those good-for-nothing ladies"
I have young and hot blood running in me now.If you dont allow me to see this, you will be responsible if I am tagged "The dirty old man"(Even though Lolitas wont come running to me, the vice versa is always possible .... :D)

"Srujith, maintain a limit on your diet.Watch out what you are eating"
Come on ma....a few pounds to the heavier side does not mean I am Adnan.(I cant be as hard on this as unlike the others)

"Srujith, start your studies"
DAMN!! I don't come home in holidays for my IAS coaching mum!!

"Srujith, when are you going to the office where you are doing your internship?It is past one week...U cant get experience sitting in the house all day beta".
Ohh...U are a pain-in-the-neck type Purist.Interns and classes are meant to be bunked.I'am not going to attend them religiously.NEVER!!!

Well, if you are wondering what this is all about, this is an infinitesimally small fraction of the argument that commences from 6 in the morning only to take a break at 11 in the night on my normal vacation day. Comning to think of it, is it really the crap and the cacophony that it seems to be at the first instant?Probably not. A truth which is as real as saying "The Sun rises in the East"...All the qualities which the society and my environment has praised me for, are those instilled in me by mommy dear and a few habits which I hate myself for are the ones I dint take care to cultivate when mum asked me to.

Even after 20 years of this relation going strong through a roller coaster ride,(Yes, I had my own serious fights with her which made matters difficult for us a few days) I still cannot get my self to hear keenly to her advices.She being an ultra successful woman in practically every sphere of life does not make matters any better.(She is a psychologist planning to do her PhD soon apart from managing a firm and working as a lecturer.She was out to write her M.Phil exam when I was writing this)But yes, She is a very close close pal. We share, we cry, we laugh, we joke together.The dialogues which I have recorded in the beginning of the post are a testimonial to this.Whenever I have the most remote problem, I know where to turn to.The last two years when I have been growing emotionally have been the years we have bonded the closest.The distance between us did not and does not matter.It is the love she shows towards me(I tried but it is not possible to reciprocate a mothers love.U can't compare an ant with Everest.Can you? ).The bond has been growing only stronger by the day and I can only hope that it grows even stronger.

After 20 years, I can't expect anything more out of that relationship and I have not given anything to that relationship.

"In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit."--- Albert Schweitzer.My flame, my candle, my breath and my life ----MY MUM

Hello all,

The thought of writing something about myself, just for the sheer pleasure of writing and knowing more about me has made me a little more than curious, and here I am with my first blog.
It is just the beginning and so I cannot really tell if I can maintain myself at writing this stuff for a fairly long time or whether it will wind in a jiffy.

Now, Let me get into some business.Well.....talking about myself and writing the 'about me' 's was never so easy.It was always the plagiarised form of a well managed version.(And I still hate to admit that).
No matter how many times I press the 'backspace' and put my grey cells to work, I just cant write about myself nor do I understand myself.One thing though, Ive got myself to believe the evil reality, I act baroque, complicated, and complex. Deep down, I know that I dont understand any philosophy, let alone practising it, but my mind does not stop flirting with Ayn Ryand's FountainHead or Osho's world of Lord Krishna.

And since Im done with what I am, as of now, let me go through briefly with my life...

As a child, and also being the only child, I grew up in the most caring hands of my parents.U can imagine the care my mother took about me when I say that in a town some 15 years back, I was sent to dance, music, karate and vocal classes(pardon me if I dont remember a few of them.....there were a hell of a lot).And all this does not in any sense mean that I was unduly pampered. On the contarary, I was one of the most strictly raised kids in my family.
All of these and a good academic record made me the cyncosure of all eyes.
But suddenly a shift to the capital city and the competition I faced left me in a faze.I slowly slid back, all my so-called talents began to wear off.Many unsuccesful attempts to get a restart went into the bin.I was getting frustrated and disappointed with life
It was at this point in life when I got into DA-IICT and a whole new different world began unfolding.

I loved the new things I saw, the books I read and the people I met, or so I thought.One new thing upon the other slowly began to have its effect on me.I became artificial for the sake of society and indifferent for the sake of myself.

And now, realising this, I am trying to shed the extra baggage I acquired all these years and retain the essence of what I have been through.

I secretly admire down-to-earth simplicity but as of now,just dont have the guts to follow it.

And readers ( if any), this is not meant to be a serious blog...It just varies according to my mood. :)